it’s not always perfect

There are a lot of things that I cook that don’t end up on this blog. Why? Because they turn out poorly. Like the ice cream that had too many ice crystals. Or the dinner that just wasn’t pretty enough. How about when I caught a spoon on fire. And not to be out done by myself, I turned around and caught sugar on fire…the same night.

I realize that this little snippet makes this sound more like a food blog than a place for laughs, but if we can’t laugh at ourselves when we royally screw the pooch, then there is no point for this blog. I’m not going to pretend that the ice cream debacle of 2k12 didn’t make me miserable for a few hours. Or that I didn’t pout around the apartment after I tried to burn down the building. I did.

Does that baby look like a grown ass woman that you may know? Well she should, because that’s me. Don’t mind the hair…it gets more nuts as I get older. But see those little hands wrapped up? I burned the shit out of them on the oven door.

It’s a long story that I’ll make short. We’ll start with my mother making potatoes for the family (obviously mine were to be mashed) and asking my brother what he wanted. In the time that it took her to ask him, I had walked over to the oven door and used it as a resting place while learning to walk. Consequently, no one had their potatoes and we spent some time in the emergency room. I also had a black eye that day, so it’s a good thing CPS didn’t take me away from my parents.

But I tell you that, to tell you this; sometimes when we’re trying new things we’re going to screw up and make mistakes. It’s just part of living. If you don’t fail, you’ll never learn.

I think a lot of the time, especially as bloggers, we get caught up in everything being perfect because that’s what people want to read and I don’t think that is totally true. Sure, people enjoy looking at pretty photoshopped pictures and your perfect boxed cake mix cupcakes (you freaking fraud) but that’s not real life. So that isn’t what you’ll get here. I’m not trying to create a facade that my life is perfect, because it isn’t and neither is yours. The sooner we all figure that out, the better off we’ll all be.

bbq chicken sandwiches

I stand firm by my beliefs that the crock pot is the world’s greatest invention. You’d have to be a real doofus to mess something up in there and better than that, it doesn’t heat your whole apartment up when it is a bajillion degrees outside. Consequently, we’ve been eating a lot of chicken tacos. This is mostly due to the fact that I’m a creature of habit but mostly lazy.

But then one day, I thought…hmmm how about I dump this here chicken into this here crock pot with a bottle of BBQ sauce. And this recipe was born.

Nope, that isn’t coleslaw because my boyfriend hates it, so I was forced into being creative. Instead, I made a chopped wedge salad and put that on top. I highly recommend this because it was really easy and tasty.

BBQ Chicken Sandwiches
4 boneless skinless chicken breasts (thawed)
1 bottle BBQ sauce (this goes without saying that mine was organic)
Salt & Pepper for good measure
Brioche Buns (don’t be a loser)

Set the crock to high for one hour and then down to low for about 4-5 hours. Once that is done continue making the…

Chopped Wedge Salad
1 head romaine thinly sliced
5 plum tomatoes
5 slices of bacon
Blue Cheese
Mayo
Heavy cream (we’re doing it up)

Chop all ingredients and throw into a mixing bowl. I used this recipe for the dressing and it was amazing. Toss with dressing. Toast your buns because it’s better that way. You can add more BBQ sauce or use the dressing on the buns, whatever floats your boat. Pile on some chicken and some of the salad. Ta freaking da!

 

this post will save your life

The title of this post is in no way misleading, nor is it false. This post will, in fact, save your life.

via

 I speak on behalf of all bloggers who proof-read and spell check their post when I say there is nothing more fucking annoying than reading blogs, the same blogs, that have spelling and grammar errors over and over.

Cheveron is not correct, neither is macaroon (when referring to the French pastry). Also your is possessive. An example: Are those your boots? While you’re is a contraction for you are. An example: You’re coming with us, right? See, it’s not so hard.

Another thing. There, their and they’re. I’m going to make this super simple, okay? I’m not going to go into the types of speech and confuse you with pronouns, etc.
 - Are you going over there? PLACE
 - Is that theirs? POSSESSIVE
 - Oh yea, they’re totally coming with. CONTRACTION FOR THEY ARE

Honestly, I cannot stress how important this is especially if you are at the point (think you’re at the point) of working with brands. You need to be polished, not perfect, but know what the hell is up. No one wants to see a site full of errors and worse, spelling BRAND NAMES incorrectly or pronouncing them incorrectly. That is just shameful. There is no excuse when you can simply google the brand or ask a few blogging friends!

In addition, may I say, that when you email someone you should also proofread that shit. The next person that says “Hey Christine” is going to get a legitimate ass kicking.

hungry like the wolf

Can we, if not for a hot second, discuss the lack of wolf-printed clothing available at the moment? Even wolf-themed jewels? There are foxes running amuck but no wolves?

You know what I call this? Discrimination. You know who isn’t discriminating against us wolves? McQ. He’s got our back from the grave. RIP, Alexander.

I do not care what you say, I need this scarf in my life on the asap. ASAP I SAY! 
Now, you might think I’m crazy or whatever. I don’t care what you think and let me tell you this, friends, if your last name was Schindewolf, I think you’d be singing a different tune. 
I make it my charge in life to acquire as much wolf-printed, themed, etc. shenanigans as I can. You’re either going to be for me or against me and I don’t think you should be against me ;)