whole 30

I hate fad diets and I feel like I need to clear that up before we proceed here. But people, I won’t lie to you, when I eat pasta the next day I feel like I was out until 4am taking Jagerbombs with my college pals.

So I feel like shit. Which is the suck. It is a lot of suck.

Why punish myself? Um, because pasta is delicious. Am I allergic to gluten? Probably. But after my most recent run in with the allergist, I’d like to stay the hell away from her office. I think I’m the only person in all of America, maybe the world, to pass out from a prick test. Ladies and gents, there are NO NEEDLES involved in the prick test. Right.

Which brings me to my next point that I hate the doctor’s and would like to stay as far away as possible. I would also like to not carry around an epi pen but that isn’t going to happen. I also want to be super skinny and hot. Kidding but serious (I realize that diet along will not accomplish this and I may actually have to work out).

Starting in one week, I will embark upon the whole 30 paleo deal. I’ll need to wake up early to eat breakfast, pack a lunch and make dinner nightly. That sounds like a real pain in my ass, but I know that I’ll feel a hell of a lot better.

And thankfully it’s not the Master Cleanse so it isn’t a starvation diet.

What do you think? Would you ever do something as ridiculous as giving up grains, alcohol and sugar?

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